mockturtle (hellblazer06) wrote,

Get Moriarty

Or when extraordinarily crap actors happen to good shows, or shows I was watching, in any case.

Monday: I've been travelling via train a lot lately (effing transport) and I noticed the no boozing sign was a crossed out martini glass, ala Ghostbusters. So I had to wonder, who is this phantom martini swiller who clinks the martini glasses on grotty cityrail trains? Because it's so not the place where anyone would ever pour themselves a martini, either shaken or stirred.

I am, of course, imagining some desperate version of Jason King, having lost the Bentley in the GFC, and now drowning his sorrows in suitable fashion every time he boards those vile carriages. Poor Jason, that it has come to this?

Yes, I am easily distracted by unreality.

Meanwhile, we stayed up late on Friday night to discover why there was a disturbance in the force as 7 million voices cried out in dismay. In other words, I watched the last episode of Sherlock.

And I think it's hilarious how the UK has gone Sherlock batty considering the complete lack of confidence the BBC had in the product: scrapping the series to make just three episodes, nobody signed for any subsequent series, a summer (ie non ratings) airing, no pre publicity whirl (certainly no tour bus), no delivery date on the dvd until after the first episode had aired, no magazine articles (at least no glossy ones). And now even the Tory government is banging on the table and demanding more please. Oh my.

Kinda reminds me of another hit that slipped onto telly almost unregarded five years ago: Life on Mars. Tsk, BBC, tsk.

I mean, you're making me actually side with the Tories, of all things, (generations of Tolpuddle etc ancestors revolve rapidly in their graves) but yes, more shows like Sherlock and less game shows, please.

Sherlock and the strange case of the belated recommissioning

That bombshell aside, I liked. Well, sort of. I see what the Guardian meant about Moriarty. Sheesh. We were hoping for Frank Thring camp, not John Inman camp. Oh dearie me.

That said, I liked, though I feel a need to cry out 'slow down, boys!' as they ripped through several stories. The seed pips are now phone pips, but the one with the body on the tracks was fairly faithful. I squeed over this because I remember reading this when I was in London and the next morning I made a minor detour to take in the locations mentioned in the book. Holmes homage before breakfast! I had so much fun with that, trying to work in book locations with my other sightseeing. Yes, I am that much of a Holmes nerd. Why, the very first place I went to, the very moment I first ever set foot on British soil, way back when, was Baker Street. Tragic, but true.

Actually, lots of my ambling about in Blighty is bookish, and makes some sort of sense to those that know. I remember reeling off places I'd visited on my second trip and straight off my friend knew I was doing an Eagle of the Ninth pilgrimage. Indeed I was. How clever of her to spot it (though entirely obvious to the initiated, I mean, Reading to the Wall?).

Anyway, I liked John's on the button disbelief at Sherlock's complete lack of interest in anything he regards as trivia, ditto Sherlock's somewhat alarming lack of concern over the fate of ordinary folk versus matching wits with Moriarty. I preseume Moriarty's amorality will serve as an educational dark shadow to Sherlock's? (Yes, I assume exactly the way the the Master was supposed to reflect the worst aspects of the doctor sans moral compass or nagging besties in lieu of said compass as need be).

I also loved Lestrade being back in the picture. They need him. He's the catty one, John is the long suffering, eye rolling one. We even had one of Sherlock's rare moments of concern for Watson As in the books, Sherlock shows great disregard for John's time or effort but in his own weird way he cares and hell hath no fury like a Sherlock facing down someone who has dared raise a hand to Watson. (I'd love to see that in White Collar but I am resigned to the fact that Peter is now Lestrade, and therefore entirely expendable, and that Neal and Mozzie appear to have shacked up together, my eyes, my eyes).

But you've all seen it by now, you either liked it or not. Was the swimming pool the best they could do for the falls? Really? And can they please tone Moriarty down, just a notch? Pretending to be gay? Yeah, right. If/when they come back, can they make him just another meatpuppet with C4 up his jacksie and recast the REAL Moriarty, for the love of Mike? Please?

A rubbish Moriarty is a fairly dire weak point in an otherwise fine series, so they really need to fix it.

High Chaparral I missed most of but I figured I could pick it up. Not a chance. Victoria in a ratty showgirl dress, being a waitress and pretending to be married to Buck. Turns out they'd been bushwhacked by a town of bushwhackers. I did like Victoria though. I can't believe how much I hated her as a kid and now I get her. What I really loved this time was how they got most of the stolen money back but were a bit short. No problem says Victoria, pulling a wad of notes from her bra with the caveat that nobody ever asks. She'd pretty much recouped the stolen cash in tips. What a gal. She's wasted on that lot, she truly is.

I shall dismiss the weekend as I didn't get anything done that needed to be done or wanted to be done. And it is distressing that the only time one gets to oneself is at 12.30 am on Saturday and 4.30am on Sunday. So I'm tired and grumpy. Can't be helped. I don't mean to be selfish and self serving, but 12:30 am? Goddamn.

I did get to the Powerhouse at last though, and that 80s exhibit. I didn't want to go because I figured it'd show me how I'd wasted my life, or how much life had missed me, but it didn't. Sure, there were magazines under glass that I used to own, but also free papers, fanzines and student rags I used to write for, and posters for bands I'd not only seen but several I'd known, and known well. There were photos of people I'd known, and remembered fondly. There were ticket stubs and videos of places I'd been, things I'd seen and done. The 80s? I lived it, honey.

Okay, so it was a parochial version of the 80s, but still, I could tick most of the boxes, and felt I'd sampled much of what that decade had to offer (even though much was cheesy and laughable). They even had hand decorated mix tapes, just like we used to make and swap. Memories, eh?

So, yeah, I might have ended up here, but wasted my youth? Nah. I did okay.

Work? My boss hates me and considers me a gross idiot. Add to that the joy of being lectured to by people who don't know what the little button with the house on it means, and you can see why one might be miserable. And it goes on from there. Nothing to do but sit tight until March. But man, it's hard going. Real hard going. Not to mention being the sole provider adding a degree of pressure I find claustrophibic at best.

PM update: Good grief, it works. Taking a leaf from one of my heroes, I just kept resubmitting something until it finally got approved.

I now need to learn not be intimidated by the red pen. But first I'm gonna try and do this with my fic. Because White Collar has finally and without a doubt contradicted something in my fic (so I read today), but, you know what? I'm just gonna ignore 'em and use my version because it's more lighthearted and flirty and it's important to be lighthearted and flirty at that point of the story (because I think Neal can be a bit too mean to Peter in the show and vice versa). This is the boys being playful, so I'm gonna keep my version, because a lot hinges on it (I just knew that scene would be trouble). So yeah, it's now officially non canon. Deal with it. I dare say my inability to use appropriate Americanisms will be more distressing. After decades of Brit cops, it's very hard to remember to use foreign words, or even know or remember there are other words I'm supposed to be using.

Ditto Lewis which, as I said, drew a big red line through most of my fic, so I'm going to have to play the unreliable narrator card. A cheat, to be sure, but it's either that or the recycling bin. And, strewth, and crikey, I just want to finish a fic. At this point, I don't care which. I just want to do something. Even if I am trying to write it at midnight when I'm too tired to spell or form complete sentences.

It ain't gonna be JPIII though. Every time, and I mean every time I flick that notebook open, there's Sam, dad dancing on the telly. It's a fic killer, that is.

Tuesday: Good news, Himself has been rehired, with lesser pay and conditions, but still. Bad news, no more house boy to fetch and carry.

Further good news: there's a R4 version of the White Collar dvd and it boasts the gag reel (but we'll see, I've bought dvds before that failed to provide extras listed on the cover). At least I have it now, bwee!

And speaking of White Collar: episodes 203 & 204, which I raced home early yesterday to view especially (thank you).

Okay, so wtf, has Mozzie shacked up with Neal? And if so, there ain't enough brain bleach in the world (my eyes, my eyes). Not quite the bromance as advertised, I note, sourly.

I mean, Jar Jar is always bloody there. I realise, from the scripts being posted on Twitter, that the writer has a definite thing for Mozzie and it's gonna be all Mozzie all the time, but jeebus, I'm not sure how much of this I can take, even for the sake of Bomer. Put it this way, I stopped watching Stargate after he made a second appearance. That is how much I hate the guy. He's tv kryptonite, as far as I'm concerned, and I'm bloody well stuck with him.

I suppose it's like watching a show for the weird non OTP pairing, and one will have to just settle for slender and minor moments like this, where the boys delightfully mirror each other. Who knew Peter and Neal would end up non OTP?

That minor quibble aside (please note that I'me being sarcastic here. I cannot stand the actor/character and he is ruining my favourite show. If we could only put him and Moriarty in a locked trunk somewhere in the desert, all would be well.) I did find much to like. Mainly the Bomer pretty. That carries a lot of really weak and unimaginative writing, it seriously does. Oh, and did you enjoy the subtle shoe-horning in of the ruddy music box arc/nuisance/macguffin/thingy into 203? Seamless, eh? Such a master touch.

Sorry, I should write these after a day of jaw grinding at work because I assure you I was all bwee! last night.

The art heist was amusing, oddly topical, and, I dare say, a touch squirm worthy for certain other viewers (heh). So we've got a Fagin-esque college professor leading a bunch of students into knocking off the Not-MoMA. Interesting to note that Peter's anti contemporary art rant was deleted (and yeah, it's always Peter's scenes that bite it). Just as well or I'd have had to have sat on my hands or something.

And that's pretty much it. There's a brief exercise with Krugerrands, Neal being bored in the van, and Alex being bundled off, stage left. Oh, there was also the bar scene where Neal runs through his tricks but I've seen it all before (it's hardly Leverage now, alas).

I much preferred Neal being insufferably smug over the homage of the copycat crime (and Peter's long suffering and accompanying Neal headache) and the bit where Peter loses it for a bit when he ralises he's been played by Neal again. I feel for Peter and the fact that Neal is always playing him, and it must be tiring and annoying (and, to my mind, shows a distinct lack of respect and kindness on Neal's part, but Neal just doesn't get that, because he is, largely, a high functioning sociopath). Neal can be as cute as a button, but so unconsciously cruel at times, because he just doesn't think.

So yeah, we got to see cute Neal and annoying Neal, and I'm not sure there are too many more sides to the boy. We saw him being loyal to his old gang at the expense of his new one (and yes, the divided loyalties are a source of tension, if I could be convinced more that Neal's loyalties actually were divided). We saw Neal being the Cheshire cat like creature he is (all tricks and smiles), but at least Peter was happy Neal was enjoying himself (a rare moment of real emotion or connection or something that wasn't just about 'face').

The Mozzie Hour one? Oh, good grief. Waste of an actress I like, silly book clues (which turned an abduction into a trvialising scavanger hunt) and, well, nice to see our supposed heroes reduced to guest roles in their own show. Oh dear.

Oddly, the things that amused me this time were extra-textual, as in, hey, that's the same rain (the rain that killed my coat) and hey, I remember that street and hey, I remember that cafe. That sort of thing. Another moment for Peter where he tries to convey his frustration to Neal, and the fact that Neal took a few years off his life with his ill considered hijinks, but, as always, Neal reacts like a brat and Peter might as well be attempting a deep and meaningful with the car upholstery, for all the attention Neal gives him. The way Neal snaps, I mean, wow, I know Neal is worried about his lil slash buddy and all, but, wow, cutting and cruel, imho. And Neal was being so pretty, too. Pretty and cruel, just the way I like 'em. Horrid combination (in other words, Peter, get out, now).

Neal was basically being a brat in both episodes (and I am greatly amused whenver Peter responds in long suffering parental tones).

Okay, yes, that's what he does, and most of the time it's cute, but sometimes it's cruel (he even snaps at Moz but I encourage that). The eternal, self absorbed adolescent act gets wearing. Especially when he's all KateKateKate and he's got all his friends and associates involved and yet he snaps if they ask anything of him, especially when Peter tries to progress to a deeper level of friendship. He's been cut off by Neal so many times now I don't know why he still tries, aside from the fact that he feels Neal is worth the trouble. I guess this is Neal's way of being all moody and shutting out, but it does come across as well, brattish. I do wonder just what it'll take for Neal to grow up and get over himself, because prison terms and dead girlfriends ain't doing it.

Not that he needs to grow up, per se, cause I get the whole trickster thing, I really do, it's just that, I dunno, and it also applies to certain recent adaptations of Robin Hood and the like, they miss twinkling rogue (think Tyrone Power in Zorro, Roger Moore in The Saint, George Sanders in The Saint, Errol Flynn in anything) and give us emo brat instead. I dunno, I just feel there's something missing, but I can't tell you what, I just know there is, you know?

It seems there's a subtle difference between a grown man being a boyish rogue and a grown man being a churlish brat (and dare I say, it seems a generational thing?).

Couldn't figure out what park they were in this time around (oh man, they're all starting to blur together) but it's not really important.

So yeah, there's me, hanging in for those rare moments where Peter and Neal actually share a scene together. Sigh. And you wonder why I'm writing fan fic, because, lawks, the show is a tease and a flirt, but not much else. Just like Neal, I guess. All hat and no cattle.

One thing that did mirror my fic was Neal constantly saying he surrendered to the FBI, except in my fic it's Neal saying he's surrendered to Peter, and it's taken a while for Peter understand that Neal had surrendered to him. As in take me, I'm yours. Silly Peter.

So no, not exactly the context they were using (because lord knows Neal and Moz are OTP on White Collar proper), but I was bemused nevertheless to have a rare snap! moment re show canon. But I'm glad they ticked that box because a lot of the (unfinished) fic I wrote way back in December relies upon it, and I was having fun borrowing from a Lewis episode of all things (the one with The Hunt in the Forest in it - and, yes, I have the fridge magnet), and the hunting motif (quite a bit of Arthurian motif as well, as my other unfinished fics bled through).

Wednesday: Blimey, it's busy here. Still, I found time to get to the shops. I love it when it's a weird scavanger hunt type list and you get everything on it. It's a peculiar sense of satisfaction, especially when the local shops tend to disappoint on staples like milk, bread and papers (and folks who shop there also end up in scattered pieces in bushland). Anyways, I got my pants, my chilli plants and my dvd of Emma (which I am loving but my viewing has being annoyingly disrupted, hence the dvd, not that I'll ever get time but it's the promise of uninterrupted viewing that holds allure).

And I still got home in time for Top Gear, or most of it. On the dot, the remote slipped and bounced onto the floor and suddenly there was Supernatural, and who am I to argue with that kind of Winchester mojo. They made me watch it.

Fell asleep during Deadwood, though. what can I say, it was a big day and I was stupid tired, like leave the lights on forget to put sugar in the tea tired.

Oh, and certain folks will be pleased to know that this week's Maverick featured an episode called "The Bundle from Britain" and indeed there was a tall and alarmingly blonde Brit in it. Too bad none of the others were. The chick of the week was doing such an alarmingly bad Eliza Doolittle mockney I was waiting for Roger to wince, and I swear he twitched at least once. Smirk. Oh, he's so young in Maverick. And boyish. And rogueish.

Help at last for the Aspergirls

Castle Taps Charmed Star to Play Beckett's Boyfriend

Mads just loves being bad ; MADE FOR MEN

Confessions of a werewolf biker

"The Tillman Story" Los Angeles Special Screening - Arrivals

The Weinstein Company Special Screening Of "The Tillman Story"

Revealed: why American teenagers know their presidential history

Mr Collins

My first X-rated movie

Naked Alexander Skarsgard Covers Rolling Stone!!!

Sul set di White Collar

TV Fanatic Exclusive: Marsha Thomason Talks White Collar Character

Fan Photos of Michael C. Hall, Matt Bomer

WHITE COLLAR Season 2 Episode 6 “In the Red” (vid)

Ford Fusion hybrid featured in USA’s "White Collar"

Breakthrough Of The Year Awards Presented By Crest 3D White - Show

Breakthrough Awards handed out

Marsha Thomason: No one could fault Diana if she turned straight for Neal

Tiffani Thiessen returns to White Collar set with baby Harper in tow

White Collar

Tags: high chaparral, matthew bomer, maverick, roger moore, sherlock holmes, supernatural, top gear, white collar

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